Top part of my sandwich fell last week.
Hip broken, mind altered.
Mind trying to do whatever it can to endure, survive, exist.

The time has come to STOP interventions.
The time is here and now.
Now is all we ever have; and the now of wholistic care has emerged on THE FRONT BURNER and the heat is way up!!

What the above mean and refers to is: as the process of aging lends itself to compensatory mechanisms, the body continues to assert itself for survival.
This is known as the "geriatric complex".
There is a point, however, when the body cannot keep juggling.

My mother has an incurable lymphoma, mitral valve regurgitation, hypertension, and more.
My mother is 87.
She is fragile in body and oh so determined in spirit! .

My mother is not ready to let go.it is not her time, but the time she has needs to be free of interventions and heroics and needs to be surrounded and full of peace and life and love.

She has always exuded unconditional love.
This does NOT mean she has been perfect or is today.
But,what it does mean:she deserves comfort and dignity, joy and relief from the yo-yo hospital visits and all the cascades of what that becomes.

A line has been drawn in the sand today.
i had to take out the pen.
i had to initiate the line.
This has been one of the hardest things I have ever done.
i do it out of love.
All the harder.
May those of you who have tread this path, are treading or will: take heart.
Count your blessings, count your friends, count and remember your breaths.

the sound you hear is the elastic of my yo-yo responding to my mother, as she yo-yo's in and out of the hospital.
Do they offer frequent flier miles?!
she's in, she's out.
she's up, she's down.

She had a fall.
She is okay.
She hit her cheek, there is a fracture.
She is confused. Induced dementia due to medication soup.
She fell again, broke her hip.

it's another day in lake mothercare...

raising parents.
when they were raising us, did they admit to wanting their time with us to be"done"?
is this harsh?
time marches on, the brilliance of pregnant green and crimson buds grace the landscape.
reprieve is in the mindfull moment of catching breath
of exforming toxins
of having an unscheduled cuppa tea with a friend.

reprieve: where are you??